Time to get serious!?!

For the first time in my life, I have been carrying a bit of extra weight long term (okay, so there what that time after first getting married....).  I don't know whether the three miscarriages in the last year or my nightly indulgence of sweet sugary somethings is more to blame but it's become quite the problem.  The kids are even starting to notice.

The other day I was loading the kids up in the car.  As I strapped Kian in his seat I was taken aback by just how cute his big chubby cheeks were.  I said to him, "Oh Kian....why can't 'chubby' look so cute on everyone."  Gabe, walking up behind me says, "Chubby does look good on everyone."  To which I replied, while grabbing the rolls of fat that have found their home around my middle, "Well, it's not cute on me."  Gabe thinks about this for a second, shrugs his shoulders and says, "But it's not UGLY on you either."  Sweet unobservant boy.

I laughed....hard.  I could have kissed the boy (come to think of it I probably should have).

and... 


Yesterday, as I'm putting Isaac and Cael to bed, Isaac looks at me and says, "Why is your tummy getting bigger?" *OUCH* "Is there a baby in there?"  *Sigh*  "No," I replied, "There is not."  He just looked at me, as though he didn't believe me.  Poor confused kid.  The only time my kids have ever seen me "round" is when there IS a baby in there.


I think it may be time to get serious about eating more healthy and loosing this excess poundage. 

Not that it stops me from doing things (I finally signed up for the Omak Warrior Stampede which will be this Saturday) but it will make me feel more comfortable in my own skin (literally) and that's pretty important to me.

We'll see how it goes.  (I sound TERRIBLY motivated, don't I...he he he).

"Here is some bad things I do not like about my mom"

Excerpt from G-McBabe's journal (written today--I know...I shouldn't be peeking):

Sunday
Here is some bad things I do not like about my mom.
1.  she makes me get off the computer right when the timer goes off
2.  you never know when she is going to yell.

Funny?....sort of.

For the "full story" and how it links to depression, come on over to my other blog...Methodical Musings of an Unbalanced Woman.

I'm just too lazy to type it up twice (or copy and paste it for that matter).
Just one easy click!

Sometimes it's hard....

Sometimes it's hard to do what's right.  I mean, when you are not doing anything that is "really bad" but know there are things you could and SHOULD change in order to become closer to God and further from the world...it can be hard.  Especially when the changes are really simple things.  For some reason it makes it harder.



I often see things i need to change.  And by changing them, I KNOW I will be a better person and feel better about myself.  But I worry what others will think.  i worry that making positive changes in MY life might make others feel bad for their choices (like I might then judge them).  I worry that people will see me as a "Molly Mormon" and wont want to be my friend.  I worry that no one will like me.  Or worse...that they will HATE me.



I know I sound like a silly school girl but I KNOW we ALL have those thoughts sometimes.



As I am working more and more on my self esteem and focussing on what Heavenly Father wants of me, I am starting to care less and less about what others think.  



Well...mostly.



That's why when I came across this scripture this morning (in the still quiet of the house because Rob took the older kids to Spokane this weekend and I am at home ALONE with a SLEEPING BABY!!!!!  FREEDOM!....ahem...to get back to the point)....anyway, when I came across this scripture this morning, I knew that the Lord was mindful of me and my worries and was giving me words of comfort and strength to go on ahead and make some of those changes.



3 Nephi 22 (which is actually in Isaiah 54 as well)



14:  "In righteousness shalt thou be established; thou shalt be far from oppression for thou shalt not fear and from terror for it shall not come near thee."



15:  ..."whosoever shall gather together against thee shall fall for thy sake."



17:  "No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall revile against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn.  This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord and their righteousness is of me, saith the Lord."



Now...these were promises given to Zion (and her people).



I will have to share my journey in self esteem soon.  It's been quite amazing.  It leaves me with a lot of....PEACE.  Yep, there is no better word to describe it....just PEACE.



I am a daughter of my Heavenly Father who loves me.  And that is ENOUGH.  I don't have to be skinny, a perfect mom, a gourmet cook, a scrapbooker, a crafter, a business woman, a beauty, a millionaire, an accomplished writer, or any other of the thousands of things I feel I fall short on and....HE STILL LOVES ME!  And I, in return, love Him and want him to be proud of me and the choices I am making. 



Sometimes change IS hard, undoubtedly....but it IS doable....it IS worth it....which is all that REALLY matters (in the ETERNAL scheme of things).

 ...and the Lord does not leave us to do it alone.



Of this I can testify, and I do so in His name, Jesus Christ. 

Sometimes it's hard...

As excited as I am about saving money and paying off our student loan debts (and believe me...I am totally psyched about it...it consumes my every though), still.....sometime the sacrifices can be hard.

REALLY hard.



I am really going to miss my Bounty paper towels.

Sniff, sniff.