I love them...and I'm even liking them a lot right now.

This last week has been a "zero screen time" week at our house (which means, no movies, no tv, no video games, no computer games).  Mini Rob is REALLY feeling the effects.  So...he took matters into his own hands.

Me- "Hey [Mini Rob], what 'cha doin'?"

Mini Rob-"Watchen' a movie....on the puter (computer)."

 

(Hilarious boy.  He even got his animals lined up watching the "movie" with him.)

 after I took these shots I heard...

"Okay mom...now can you take a picture of me?"

 

 (Such a handsome, photogenic boy.  I love him.  

This is one of those pictures that I look at and can picture what he might look like as a teenager or adult.)

Then I take the camera out to take pictures for my couponing blog and Mr. Golden Locks comes toddling over saying "sheeeessss"....."sheeeeesssss" ("Cheese").  

I guess he wanted his picture taken too.  :) 

I just love this little bundle of joy.  Such a spunky little turkey. 

Epipen-free Adventures in Peanut Butter Yummyness!

Rewind 4 years.  Melanie feeds Little Red (just a week shy of 1 year) a few raisins from a canister of trail mix.  Little Red breaks out in hives.  Melanie sets up allergy testing appointment.  Little Red finds a peanut on the floor at grandma's house (from same canister of trail mix).  Little Red chews it up.  Melanie finds him and makes his spit it out.  Little Red breaks out in hives again...this time with a bit of hoarse coughing and crying.  Scary!  Go to allergist just SURE that he is severely allergic to peanuts.  Not so much.  He did test positive for a peanut allergy but actually pretty mild.  Cashews were the big culprit.  So much that even a bit of oil could cause his throat to swell and close off.  The doctor was convinced that that is what happened.  He believed the oil from the cashew caused the reaction...not the peanut itself.  "He may even grow out of the peanut allergy," he says. 


We've spent several years being very careful and very paranoid.


6 weeks ago we took G-McBabe and Little Red to the allergist.  Diagnosis:  Both are allergic to many grasses and tumbleweeds (JUST GREAT for here in the good old tumbleweed haven of Washington).  Second, Little Red's peanut protein test comes up negative (although his cashew protein sensitivity more than doubled from the last test....great).  They try another tactic.  They spread actual peanut butter on Little Red's back, poke the skin with a needle, you know, to draw it under the skin and into the blood steam.  Nothing.

Hhhhmmmm.....


Fast forward to yesterday.  Little Red and I spent nearly 4 hours at the allergist for a food trial.  After checking vitals and making sure Little Red was in good health (and I sign a waiver on his life...ahem), he was given a lick, a very small lick of peanut butter.  We watch very vigilantly for signs of distress for 20 minutes.  Nothing.  Next, 1/16 tsp...20 minutes....Nothing.  1/8tsp...20 minutes...nothing....etc (you get the idea).  The doses doubled each time until we reached 2 tsp....20 minutes....again, nothing.  The doctor clears him of his peanut allergy (stating that he hadn't been worried since we passed the 1/16tsp) with orders to make sure he has at least SOME type of peanut product every other day.  This is so that the body can continue it's "immunity" to the proteins.  Makes sense, right? 


No problem here.  Little Red requested a peanut butter sandwiches for lunch when we got home.  And today.  He loves it so far.

Even better than that...he tasted his VERY FIRST Reese's peanut butter cup tonight.  LOVED IT!  Watch for yourself.

It's funny how things work out.  When Little Red was two weeks shy of a year I wanted to make him a peanut butter sandwich ("He's ALMOST one, right?").  I had a bad feeling about it and decided not to.  Just a few days later, as I am picking raisins to feed him out of a trail mix, I think to myself..."maybe I shouldn't."  I rationalized,  "He's had raisins before.  He should be fine."  Not once did I think about danger from nut oils ON the raisins.  Why would I?  Thankfully the Lord had mercy on poor Little Red.  A bunch of incredibly itchy hives (anywhere his saliva touched (which was just about EVERYWHERE)) and mild throat closure.  Things could have turned out worse.  MUCH WORSE. 


So...I just about hyperventilated making him his first PB sandwich (even though I had just watched him ingest PB all morning).  But...we made it through.  Unscathed.  I kept a very close eye on him.  Very close.

It still feels so taboo.  So bad....so scary.  I still want to go and wash my hands and the counter every time I touch peanut butter or look at it or even think about it (I'll have to share my "Walgreens ad cashew overreactions" later).  At the doctor's office Little Red was playing with my phone and put the screen pointer in his mouth and I thought to myself, "Don't do that...you have been eating peanut butter...Little Red could touch it...and then he could get sick."  Uh....DUH!

I'm sure with time it will get better.  With the peanuts at least.

We were reminded, with even more caution, NOT to feed Little Red ANY kind of TREE NUT.  E.V.E.R!  His allergy to cashews is so severe that there is a huge risk with ANY possible sort of contamination from nut to nut.  It could prove to be fatal or in the least, make him very very sick.

It is a scary thing to live with.  For him...and for us.  But...it's our life.....it's HIS life.  And until he is old enough to make the choices for himself (as in a snotty teenager who thinks he's invinsible),  we deal with it one day at a time.  And we NEVER leave home (or try not to) without out trusty Epipen...or two...or three...or four.  I think we actually have five.  :)

Just in case.

Kia's ONE!

 

It's crazy to think that the last year has flown by so fast.  It amazes me that Kian is one.



He's an adorable little boy with lots of spunk and personality.  Whether or not he wants to display it, now that is the question.  He is generally pretty quiet and enjoys toddling after his brothers, looking at books and playing with cars.



He has always enjoyed jabbering (at the dinner table mostly) and was the earliest of my boys to start walking (11 1/2 months).  He says a few distinguishable words and knows an animal sound or two.



He can say:



*  "Dada"

*  "MAAAAAM"  (not a cute, quiet, or sweet "mama" from this boy).  Think of the most annoyingly cute way your child could yell MOM and that would be pretty close to the way Kian calls me.

*  "GAAAAAAAABE"  (also said with the same type of inflection as "maaaaaaam").  Apparently he has heard me call loudly for Gabe too many times.

*  "nigh nigh" ("night night") while he waves.

*  "bye bye"  (sort of)

*  Jesus (just started working on that one)

*  He also knows the duck says "quack quack"



He loves his brothers to pieces (when they are not tormenting him) and they love him as well.



When I was pregnant I prayed that Kian would be the binding glue our family so desperately needed and he has been just that.  Everyone loves him very much and he loves us all in return.  His birth/his life has been a great catalyst for some much needed family healing.



On to the BIG day....



His party was very low key (Rob and the older three had just gotten home from their weekend trip to Spokane).  We sang "Happy Birthday" (with help from family on Skype), he tried to blow out his candle and was successful with a bit of help from his BIGGEST bro Gabe, and dug in to his cake (for a few seconds at least).  It was fun.

WE LOVE YOU KIAN!

Mr.Golden Locks is ONE!

 

It's crazy to think that the last year has flown by so fast.  It amazes me that Mr. Golden Locks is one.

He's an adorable little boy with lots of spunk and personality.  Whether or not he wants to display it, now that is the question.  He is generally pretty quiet and enjoys toddling after his brothers, looking at books and playing with cars.

He has always enjoyed jabbering (at the dinner table mostly) and was the earliest of my boys to start walking (11 1/2 months).  He says a few distinguishable words and knows an animal sound or two.

He can say:

*  "Dada"
*  "MAAAAAM"  (not a cute, quiet, or sweet "mama" from this boy).  Think of the most annoyingly cute way your child could yell MOM and that would be pretty close to the way Mr. Golden Locks calls me.
*  "GAAAAAAAABE"  (also said with the same type of inflection as "maaaaaaam").  Apparently he has heard me call loudly for G-McBabe too many times.
*  "nigh nigh" ("night night") while he waves.
*  "bye bye"  (sort of)
*  Jesus (just started working on that one)
*  He also knows the duck says "quack quack"

He loves his brothers to pieces (when they are not tormenting him) and they love him as well.

When I was pregnant I prayed that Mr. Golden Locks would be the binding glue our family so desperately needed and he has been just that.  Everyone loves him very much and he loves us all in return.  His birth/his life has been a great catalyst for some much needed family healing.

On to the BIG day....

His party was very low key (Rob and the older three had just gotten home from their weekend trip to Spokane).  We sang "Happy Birthday" (with help from family on Skype), he tried to blow out his candle and was successful with a bit of help from his BIGGEST bro G-McBabe, and dug in to his cake (for a few seconds at least).  It was fun.

WE LOVE YOU!

Jesus and Spiders

I was just out working in the yard with Little Red.  We were having a discussion.  Good bugs vs. bad bugs.

After a brief pause he says...

"Wow.  There are a lot of things that protect ours family.

Jesus...spiders...mosquito eaters...armies."

Me:  "Yep, [Little Red]...you are so right"

He amazes me.

Sometimes it's hard....

Sometimes it's hard to do what's right.  I mean, when you are not doing anything that is "really bad" but know there are things you could and SHOULD change in order to become closer to God and further from the world...it can be hard.  Especially when the changes are really simple things.  For some reason it makes it harder.



I often see things i need to change.  And by changing them, I KNOW I will be a better person and feel better about myself.  But I worry what others will think.  i worry that making positive changes in MY life might make others feel bad for their choices (like I might then judge them).  I worry that people will see me as a "Molly Mormon" and wont want to be my friend.  I worry that no one will like me.  Or worse...that they will HATE me.



I know I sound like a silly school girl but I KNOW we ALL have those thoughts sometimes.



As I am working more and more on my self esteem and focussing on what Heavenly Father wants of me, I am starting to care less and less about what others think.  



Well...mostly.



That's why when I came across this scripture this morning (in the still quiet of the house because Rob took the older kids to Spokane this weekend and I am at home ALONE with a SLEEPING BABY!!!!!  FREEDOM!....ahem...to get back to the point)....anyway, when I came across this scripture this morning, I knew that the Lord was mindful of me and my worries and was giving me words of comfort and strength to go on ahead and make some of those changes.



3 Nephi 22 (which is actually in Isaiah 54 as well)



14:  "In righteousness shalt thou be established; thou shalt be far from oppression for thou shalt not fear and from terror for it shall not come near thee."



15:  ..."whosoever shall gather together against thee shall fall for thy sake."



17:  "No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall revile against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn.  This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord and their righteousness is of me, saith the Lord."



Now...these were promises given to Zion (and her people).



I will have to share my journey in self esteem soon.  It's been quite amazing.  It leaves me with a lot of....PEACE.  Yep, there is no better word to describe it....just PEACE.



I am a daughter of my Heavenly Father who loves me.  And that is ENOUGH.  I don't have to be skinny, a perfect mom, a gourmet cook, a scrapbooker, a crafter, a business woman, a beauty, a millionaire, an accomplished writer, or any other of the thousands of things I feel I fall short on and....HE STILL LOVES ME!  And I, in return, love Him and want him to be proud of me and the choices I am making. 



Sometimes change IS hard, undoubtedly....but it IS doable....it IS worth it....which is all that REALLY matters (in the ETERNAL scheme of things).

 ...and the Lord does not leave us to do it alone.



Of this I can testify, and I do so in His name, Jesus Christ.